I’m seeing alot of commentary about this Surviving R .Kelly Docu and it’s sad that it has taken this long to have an open dialogue about these issues that are very prevalent in today’s society, however I am happy that it has sparked interest and conversations. Regardless of what your opinions are about him on whether he did it or not or if you will continue to support him here after because of his music, I want to you know that this is bigger then him or any other perverted person that takes advantage of children. Honestly, speaking because this started long before they meet him in my opinion.

It is imperative that you start early with building a healthy foundation for your children to stand on! You have to start earlier with having conversations with them about what innocent and healthy dynamics are and what that looks like in respects to relationships with the opposite sex and also the same sex, because sexual violence is not gender based: meaning that it does not discriminate! You need to inform them about what appropriate touching is and vice versa and create a safe space for them to come to you without fear of being shunned against or ridiculed!

Not only that you have to instill in them early a sense of Security and Idenitity that is separate from what anyone else brings to them! It needs to be rooted in Self esteem, Self love, Self Worth, and Value and Self Assurance!

Because sadly, if they do not have this foundation set already and believe it; then they ruin the chance of running into people with Predatory Minds. These people Prey on their Misguided, Naive, and Gullible Innocence!

This is extremly important for Single mothers raising girls because since a father is not present in the home or in their lives on a consistent bases most girls will go to the opposite sex to try to fill a void because of their father’s absence. When that void is not fulfilled from within; it creates more issues because It tends to send a person on a quest to try to fill that empty space!

That is why all of this has to be grounded and instilled within them early on in life because, even if the father is absent from her/child life than they still have a strong sense of Security and Identity about themselves. I feel that no one is will be able to take advantage of them because they know what boundaries are, and they already have a strong sense of Value about themselves so they don’t need outside Validation; so their not in search of love, or to be be valued or appreciate and essentially Accepted!

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